Last night I dreamed.  Well, every night I dream, but last night it seemed that my dreams were very memorable.

Dream package of hot sauce: Dat'l Do It!

Maybe it’s because I woke up every two hours.  With Macy.  Who had IBS or some sort of explosive planted within her bowels.  I think she ate some TNT
or the stuff they use in NYC to blow up skyscrapers.

Where oh where are those bomb-sniffing dogs when you need them…

Oops.  Better deal with the explosives another way.  Macy hates it when other dogs sniff her rear, so bag that idea.

But that’s another story for another time.

So.  Back to the dreams.

They were not Martin Luther King Jr’s,   “I have a dream…” type of dreams.  They were more like ones directed by David Lynch or Tim Burton.  With quirky characters  and lots of unanswered questions.

Who was that Japanese woman?  And why did I have to go to her husband’s funeral?  Why wouldn’t she talk to anyone but me?

Why did Zill go swimming in a dirty pool with algae, leaves and bugs in it?  She couldn’t wait to slip into the slimy water, though usually she is quite finicky about icky things.

Why was everyone fighting over who would drive the car and sit in the front seat?  And after the ensuing argument, which I must have won, because I wound up driving…  why did I not realize that I took off on the car trip without my husband until I got to the destination?  And why was that so funny?  In my dream, even he laughed, though in real life he would have been quite perturbed.

How did I fit my car through a needle eye to park in a garage that had barely enough room in it for an orange?  And how did I get out when the doors had barely enough space to open?

And then there was the freeway dream.

Was driving in a slow moving clump of traffic.  But with ease, I maneuvered around the slower than slow vehicles.  The road ahead was clear, and I was driving the speed limit free of obstacles and limitations.  What a relief!

Just then, a woman, driving in the wrong direction appeared on the freeway.  She was headed right for me.  I deftly avoided her, but she continued to speed in the wrong direction.  I looked through my rear view mirror worried that she would hit the people behind me.

She seemed intent on doing just that.  She slipped into the tight configuration of slow vehicles and slammed into a truck.  Head on.

All the people in the truck perished.  They were bleeding, but it wasn’t blood.  It was hot sauce.  It was a movie.  And nothing really happened.  The dead people all got out of the truck, and the director yelled, “Cut! That’s a take.”

So are dreams really like movies?  Is life just a series of films that we direct?  Then feel free to re-write your scream play into something more palatable.  That’s why God inventing Craig Shoemaker who gave us the Love Master routine… Erase!  Erase!  Erase!  And then Re-write!

Fun Your Way out of the Box!

break free · clearing obstacles · Dat'l do it · dream gestalting · hot sauce · rewrite the script of your life · swimming in dirty pools · the sky's the limit

Today I walked through the day with closed eyes.  Figuratively.  Not Literally.

It was just one of those days which I wanted to snuggle in bed and meditate and do Reiki.

The husband and daughter took off for the Swap Meet.  Ahh!  Two hours of bliss.  Moments like this rarely happen for a harried mom!    But somehow, every time I tried to go off into another mind place, the phone rang.  Aaacccchhh!  Dontcha hate that?

I tried to remain calm.  But it was kind of tough.  I was so looking forward to my time alone.  So I took a deep breath, went to my favorite place.  And wouldn’t ya know it?  Within moments, the husband and the whelp returned home.

Then I had to sterilize a filthy hairbrush my daughter bought, admire a new handbag, and gush over a discounted box of Q-tips.  Ah.  So much for a mom’s day off.

So after hairbrush cleaning/sterilization, and ooh-ing and ahh-ing I did the next best thing.  I only pretended I was hanging with the family, but I was actually off somewhere else.  On a mini-vacation of the mind.

I walked through the day with my eyes closed.  Figuratively.  Not Literally.  As I said before.  Good thing, because though I know my house pretty well, doors and walls have a tendency to bump into me!

It was very nice, and now I feel like I actually had the day off that I expected.

What is funny is that I was discussing vacations of the mind with a friend.  She was tired and wanted to go on holiday, but because of finances and the need to work, she was unable to take the rest she needed.

For my dear friend, I wrote the following mini meditation.

Then I got to thinking.  Maybe other people need a break, too!  A break that does not require logging into Travelocity.  Or driving/flying/train taking/bus riding/boat floating….  Or wads and wads of cash.

So I’m sharing this with you, dear reader, if you need a little Time Off, that is totally free.  Please enjoy the following script for a Vacation of the Mind.

Beautiful Sunset

Close your eyes, and imagine you are at a place that you love. Imagine it with all of your senses.

See the sights, the colors of this place. The color of the sky. The look of the flora and fauna. What is the lay of the landscape?  See it as if you are there.  Because You Are There.

Hear the sounds. Are there birds chirping? Are there sounds of water, like the ocean waves crashing or the sound of abundance flowing like a babbling brook?  Hear everything as if you are there.  Because You Are There.

Smell and taste the scents in the air. The aroma of the flowers or the spray of salt water in the breeze. Perhaps the scent of pine trees or crisp mountain air?  What kind of food is there to eat?  Inhale the aromas of what you are eating.  Taste and chew.  And enjoy.  Calorie Free.  With amazing culinary sensations.  Yum.

Feel. The breeze brushing gently through your hair. The sun on your skin. The soft grass or crunchy sand beneath your feet.  Is it warm?  Is it cold?  What are you wearing?  Is it comfy?  Or itchy?  Or bulky?  Or light?

What are you doing?  Are you alone?  Or are you with someone?  Or in a group?  Whether alone or with others, imagine with all your senses that you are at this place enjoying yourself immensely!

Spend at least five minutes here in chronological time.  And allow your mind to believe that this five minutes is expanded into a long weekend, a week, or a month.  Whatever amount of time you actually need will reside in five minutes of “real” time.

Because time isn’t real.

Breathe.

Sense the blissfulness. You are at peace. And more relaxed than you have ever been. Take yourself deep within, into the core of your being. Into your higher self. Lift yourself above the earthly dimension and allow yourself to fully partake in this place that you love.

This is your mini vacation. This is your special place. You can go here any time you need to recharge your mind, body and spirit. You feel light, relaxed and at peace.

In this place, allow yourself to release all stress and tension you may be holding in your physical body. Empty yourself of all negativity. Imagine a vacuum cleaner is just sucking all that stuff out of you.

And now, empty of all the dreck, imagine the Universe filling you with light, love and boundless energy. You feel amazingly good. You shine and glow with radiant health and happiness and good fortune.

Again.  Please allow yourself to spend at least five minutes in this place. Five minutes of “real time” will feel like a wonderful, vacation of the perfect length of time for you, be it a long weekend or a month. For “real” time is only what you choose it to be.

When you feel fully recharged, bring yourself comfortably back to room awareness. Then open your eyes, reach your hands over your head and stretch. Then say, “YES!”

Copyright 2010 Vicky Schroeder

My gift to you.  Enjoy your trip!

Fun Your Way out of the Box!

harried mom · Holiday · hypnosis · meditation · mini vacation of the mind · reiki · Swap Meet · Time Off

Today.  The highlight of my day.  Was dat I bawt dawg fude.

Yay faw Pet Supply!

Now dat might not sound like much of a highlight to youse.

But.  If you are having a somewhat less than interesting day, as in BAW-rink, just think how much maw fun it could be if you could tawk funny.  And once youse stawrt tawkin’  funny, youse just can’t stop.  And you just tawk and tawk and tawk.  Till awl of a sudden you fahget dat yaw day was somewhat less than interestink, as in BAW-rink, in da foist place.

Becawz you unbawed yawself with loo-dah-criss tawk.

Considering how much I enjoy putting on my New Jersey accent from time to time, it was quite a highlight. Becawz Dawg is inherently a New Yawk/New Joyzey accent woid.

And I bawt two bags.  Of  dawg fude.  Dat’s a Double Dawg Dare Dose of Dawg Fude.  Dat’s double da plehzhuh!  Dat’s not Doublemint Gum.

So I brawt my dawg fude home.  And my dawg jumped awl ovah me with excitement.  Becawz she hadn’t eaten since like, breakfast.  And the moments between meals to a dawg is like a lifetime.

So.  Accawdkink to Macy, she was stawvink to death.

But if you look at her, she looks more like an overstuffed sawsij than Skeletawr.

Dis is Not Macy, Dis is Skeletaw

Dis is a Sawsij. Dis is Not Macy. But easy to make dat mis-stayke

What made it maw excitink to Macy is dat wit her Double Bag of Dawg Fude, she got hamboygah.  Will the excitement nevah end?

Oy.  Get me outta dis box!  May tomorrow be maw interestink den dawg fude!

Fun yaw way outta da box!

change your perspective · tawk new yawk

Have you ever had a negative person beat down your dreams to learn how to fly threw the air with the greatest of ease, spinning and flipping on a crazy trapeze?

Or tell you not to go bungee jumping off some bridge in Azusa?

Or say you shouldn’t go to Toastmasters because you already know how to speak and talk?

All I have to say about that is let what they say be an old school cassette tape in your head, and…

Erase! Erase! Erase!

Fun Your Way out of the Box!

No tags

Wow.

Worry is such a heavy weight.  Yet it is one we may not know we are carrying.  It’s like wearing an invisible suit of chain mail or full body armor that was purchased at the Medieval Shop of Factory Seconds.

Hot Knight in San Diego with mini Zill at the Medieval Shop of Factory Seconds. NO LOITERING!

Medieval because most likely the style is outdated.

Suit of armor weighing you down? Looks kind of like a tight squeeze. Slip into some comfy and stylish shorts instead!

And Factory Seconds… well, because they are not perfect.  The construction is shoddy.  Perhaps the seams have a slipped stitch or seven.  And maybe the grommets are not welded with precision.

Oh.  Yeah.  Let’s not forget Measurements.  One leg might be shorter than the other.  Or the neck hole is larger than the waist.  Or the cowl neck is kind of lopsided.

Ew.  Cowl neck?  That’s so 70′s… Please tell me it’s not a hot pink velour chain mail full body armor suit.  I will just die!

And then of course there’s Color.  One arm may have a slight bleach stain, the back be a lighter shade of turquoise than the front, or there may be a disfiguring pinkish blotch across the shoulder blades.

Ew.

Why oh why would we purchase our worries as Factory Seconds when we can get perfectly good ones at a reliable retail outlet at full cost?  Oh yeah.  I forgot.  The economy sucks.  We might as well get a discount on our worries, too.

Bargain shopping rocks.

Or say it’s an old worry.  One we were lucky enough to inherit from our mothers.  So yay!  That one was a freebie.

Yet free or purchased, we get so tangled up in worry that we can’t seem to release ourselves from it.  Kind of like a spider web of rusty steel wool.

Kind of itchy.  Kind of irritating.  Doesn’t do much to clean the crap off the pots, yet we keep it around.

So what to do with this worry stuff?  Useless.  Heavy.  Entangling.

Lay a little lightness trip on yourself.

Like sometimes I feew wike tawking wike Elmah J Fudd.  Dat always wowks faw a few minutes.

Or you can listen to and watch this:

Bobby McFerrin\’s Don\’t Worry Be happy

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l9K4BKkLaCI

Or en Espanol:

Or in Burly-esque:

Or you can take a Hip-no-therapy trip with me.  Call me at 714.313.1473 to schedule a Wewease Yawsewf fwom Wowwy Wewaxation Session!  It’s Fun!  And more reliable than a Factory Second Chain Mail Full Body Armor Suit in Hot Pink Velour!

Wewease Yawsewf from Wowwy Now!  Fun Your Way out of the Box!

entangled emotions · factory seconds · Hip-no-therapy · hypnotherapy · release worry · weight of worry

So.  Today was a sunshine-y day.  As was yesterday.

Yay for California!  No midsummer thunderstorms or showers of golf-ball- sized hail for us.  We have nothing but never ending sunshine from July 1st through September.

Though it was beautiful, today was kind of a waste, because Zill would not get off of FaceBook.  And I wanted to do sunshine-y day stuff.  Thank goodness for Macy who can always be counted on to want to do outdoors dog type of stuff.  Like going on walks and digging holes.

So.  I spent the first part of my morning being walked by a dog; watching her sniff urine samples in the grass; chomping odd bits of leftover chicken bones and other picnic crap; being dragged on squirrel, duck and goose chases; and of course supervising hole digging.

Zill was less exciting.  Because yesterday I wore her out, kind of, kayaking.

I only kind of wore her out, because I did most of the rowing, while she chomped on Pringles and commented on her favorite Huntington Harbor Homes.  While I rowed.  Hypnotically entranced by the monotony of stroke after stroke after stroke.  Yes I felt like an ocean bourne Sherpa.

Yo! Sherpa!  You are in the wrong geographic element.  Get back to the mountains.

Yeah.  So I awoke this morning feeling like I climbed Mount Everest.  Boy was I sore.  That ocean rowing for two people is kind of rough on a little person like me.

I guess it was good that Zill took today off.  And that now I am just relaxing in the moonlight.  Sipping wine.  Happy that it was a sunshine-y day!

Take a break from your routine and Fun Your Way out of the Box!

hypnotic · summer · sunshine · take a break

The fight has been completely drained from me.  There is nothing left for me to give but submission.  And I am not sure I like it much.

Submitting Your Way out of the Box is not very fun.

Stay tuned.  Let’s see if there’s even a box left tomorrow.

letting go · submission

Do you have someone in your life who is that Wet Blanket cliche type of person? Someone, according to Free Dictionary and Wiktionary who could be called a fuss-budget, fusspot, worrywart, killjoy, cold fish, spoil sport, stick in the mud or party pooper?

Woody about to be Whacked by a Wet Blanket Cliche Type Person. Kind of a killer of joy kinda guy--the one with the axe, that is...

Then there’s this guy.  How does Sponge Bob put up with him?

Mr. Happy Himself

Do you wish you could just throw them over the clothes line and whack them with one of those old fashioned whacker paddles? Or send them through the wringer? (Also a nice way for to flatten those abs!) Or toss them into the high desert heat in mid-August to dry them out?

Me too.

But that doesn’t work. They are naturally retentive of moistures.

For some reason, these wet blanket people are a never ending source of dampness. They are the parade rainers of this world. There is no stopping them from attempting to drown out your happy. They are huge proponents of the burgeoning spread of mildew-dy of the spirit.

So what I suggest is that we can use them to save California from its drought.

Wouldn’t it be a great way to refill Mono Lake? We could seed the clouds for a nice, plentiful rainy season, and never have to worry about a drought ever, ever again!

This is a nice, bright, positive way to look at a mean and gloomy situation.

So the next time you run into a Wet Blanket Cliche Person, know that they are doing their part to re-water the planet.

Fun Your Way out of the Box!

look on the bright side · postive thinking

Today I made it a point to listen. I shut my mouth. Looked directly at the conversationalists. And put my full attention to all speakers that spoke to me.

It was kind of cool to not have to say anything. To learn about someone’s dreams and ideas. To let them ramble on without interruption…

And the people that were speaking felt fully appreciated and understood.

Try it.

listening

This morning I woke up. Which is usually a good way to start the day.
I had a sense of well-being that it was a day and I was awake.

The thing was.  Because there was a thing, you know.  That for some reason my head felt like it had a spike growing out of it.  Or even a mountain.  It was a curious way to start the day.

I wondered.  But not to the point of actually getting up.  What the appendage on my head might be.  Could I have turned into a unicorn?  With the state of my dreams, last night, anything was possible.  For my slumbering journeys over the past few hours were quite odd and unusual.

Probably nothing to do with eating that late night snack of left over lasagne noodles covered in hot sauce, sliced jalapeno olives, and melted havarti with dill.

Or that on my way home from a Meeting of Toastmasters, I watched the moon set over the 22 freeway.  It was close to the horizon, a giant crescent, looking like a huge banana in the sky.

I’d post a picture.  But I decided to drive safely for a change!  Yay,  Zill!  Your co-pilot lectures on safe driving and not being a Maria Shriver emulator are working on me.  (She will one day be a great hypnotist, no?)

I felt my head.  To the touch, it wasn’t bumpy.  But my reiki energy detected something extra where my physical face ended.  There was a sense that my forehead was Lieutenant Worf-ish.  Maybe my time travels with Shelley had turned me into an alien overnight.

Worfed feeling in my Brain

Finally, my curiosity got the better of me.  I had to get up and check.  Check the mirror.

And the person that looked back at me was me.

Whew!

That was a relief.  I don’t think my hat would have fit if I was suddenly Worfed!

Okay.  Time to start my day.  Thank goodness some dreams don’t come true!

Have a Fun Your Way out of the Box Day!

dreams · hypnosis · reiki